Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Monkey Trap

The original monkey trap involves a hollow coconut chained to a stake and baited with food. It has a hole large enough for the monkey to put its hand into, but too small to remove its hand while holding the bait. The monkey needs only to let go to escape, but gets caught because it refuses to let go in its panic to keep its precious find.
This sort of trap is allegorical and parallel to many things and situations.  When I think of the larger picture of my legal battle with Nesley (my X landlord), I realize that she is in a very similar type trap.  So grandiose, and arrogant she is, that she may not even realize that she has gotten herself into the trap.  Nesley, I hope you are one of the shadow followers to this blog and are reading this.  This blog is for you!  You thought you tricked me, and by now you must realize that in doing so, you tricked yourself.  You made a $40 mistake that is going to cost you hundreds of dollars.  Certainly by now you must realize that if you don't keep your promises, and if you don't pay your workers a fair wage, it will end up hurting you (costing you more) later.  I hope your other tenants are watching this whole thing closely.  You realize, that if all your frienemies decide to retaliate at once you will be in a pickle.  The only way out of the trap dumb ass is to let go of the fruit!  It has always been the only way out of the trap, and always will be.  Learn something, change something about yourself, and get on with it.  You won't ever get a penny from a judgement proof individual (like me).  You can whine, you can scream, you can even try to buy your way to garnishment, but unless you can get a federal judge to garnish my wages you are just throwing your money away and wasting your energy.  Worse yet Nesley, if I can demonstrate "retaliatory eviction" you just might have to pay me all the back rent I payed you, in addition to the money in my counterclaim.
Has there ever been a monkey smart enough to get his hand free of the trap?  I don't know the answer to that.  Looks like he might just make his hand swell up trying to get that fruit out, that even if he finally lets go, his hand will be too swollen to come out.
This legal process is not fun for me, but I am willing to make it my job.  I am willing to study the law every day, and contact the court every day in order to not let you have an automatic win.  I am willing to spend every available cent of money I have in filing motions, making copies of pictures, filing objections and appeals.  You are not going to just shit on me (take my money, my possessions, MY PRECIOUS TIME) and then just skip on your merry way.  You may win in the end.  I can not predict how a judge will interpret my evidence.  I can handle loss and disappointment.  What I can't do is just forfeit by default.  I have not ever done it, I won't do it, and if I were you I would find a way to drop that piece of fruit.  Because by the time you get your hand out of the jar it will be deformed or the fruit will be ruined.
I can make myself love this legal process Nesley.  I can do that.  I can stop doing art and just love doing legal things for the next month and a half.  Cause you know what, "you don't have to do anything for the rest of your life".  It is true.  Tomorrow you can do something else.  It is our greatest power as human beings is our capacity to change.  Change our minds.  Change our habits.  Change our ways. 
Don't forget your disgruntled worker two summers ago that put a shotgun to your head because you wouldn't pay him.  I tell you, I never forgot it.  I actually learned something from that experience.  Here you were busy learning the wrong thing...."oh my knight in shining armor came to my rescue".  What a dumb way to interpret that scenario.  What you could have learned is not to cheat somebody as they might just blow your head off for a few dollars.  Pay the man what you owe him, and you won't have to worry about your knight in shining armor being there to save you.  You were lucky that time Nesley.  You could have been killed, just because you were stingy and not in the mood to pay the piper.  One of these days you might not be so lucky.  I am thinking maybe not to far in the distant future....say November 15th.

No comments: