Sunday, July 13, 2014

And The Hate Goes On

My enemy's are cleaver.  The careful planting and use of lies is one of the tools in their toolbox of hate.  Imagine...trying to walk around, doin the right thing and encountering acquaintances that are suddenly unfriendly.  Imagine being disinvited, and not knowing what caused it.  
Yesterday, I uncovered a big fat insidious lie that has been going around drum groups I had belonged to in Columbus.  This morning I am relieved in a way.  I am off the hook.  Don't expect me to apologize for something I didn't do in the first place.
What I did not uncover was the motive.  I have no idea who all is responsible for the spreading of this lie, or how many other lies may be in play.
It is hurtful to be a target of such hate.  Some people are so fractured that they would take it out on themselves.
In 1998 I confronted the hate group that targeted me, other gays, environmentalist, feminists, witches.  I confronted them with scripture.

 “Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs which indeed appear beautiful outwardly, but inside are full of dead men’s bones and all uncleanness.
I was not in the church at the time of my "tantrum".  I was in the building next door.  The building that housed the labyrinth that I had dedicated a year of my life to raise money, and support for.  I was not there for the LGBT program.  I was there to construct the labyrinth.  I attended the feminist Sunday school class upon occasion.  I had attended "spirituality" circles that met at Church members houses.  I had attended a habitat for humanity house raising.  I was strong armed into having my picture taken for the church bulletin.  A year of interaction with the "good" people of First Baptist Church.
I was a target.  These groups that stemmed from that church were nothing more than an elaborate trap constructed to lure in seekers.  A welcoming and affirming hook, that resulted in much misery for anyone unfortunate enough to fall for it.  At first there was love bombing...most cults operated that way.  I stayed right up until I could not endure the quiet hate being directed at me.  I couldn't stand one more minute of it.  It was not a clean confrontation.  
That day the hate came in the form of a "white trash party".  A postcard circulating that featured a poor white woman in front of her broken down trailer and 3 snotty nose kids.  It is only funny if you are a right wing conservative.  So I knew, at that moment that I was in the midst of a wasp nest.  They took a year of my life, and I have tried my hardest to move on.  I moved away, out of their reach, and began making a new life for myself.

So this new lie that is being spun, stems from my behavior that day.  There is a lie that was carefully constructed 2 years ago that I had cussed out the drum leader in public, in front of not only the drummers, but an audience.  That simply isn't true, but I have to applaud the cleverness behind it.  Is this the long arm of the religious right getting at me through my sister and brother drummers, or is this the work of one person who is using the information from that day in 1998?  The whole outburst would be out of context, so parts of the story have been cleaverly changed....scripture of Jesus Christ, becomes cussing a drum leader out, embarrassing her in public.

I was surrounded then by pretenders.  People pretending to be welcoming and affirming, while behind the scenes setting up heartache for the targets.  I was not the only target.   

2 years ago, when the lie about me began circulating, a new drummer came into our midst from Granville.  Not only was she from Granville, she had social media ties directly linking her to that church and the hypocrites I met there.  I blocked her, as I did not want the First Baptist Church members having access to my daily posts.  I knew they were not going to change their tactics.  They are above all else self righteous.  They actually believe in their superiority, and to my knowledge there are no laws forbidding them to set up fake groups to entrap targets.  It is no wonder that 911 happened on US soil, because hate groups are protected under the 1st amendment in our constitution.  

1n 1998, I did not have access to a computer.  I didn't want access.  Everyone around me seemed so enamored in that artificial world, that the real world was somehow not as important.  I did not want to separate myself from the natural world as my comrades seemed to be doing.  How easy it was for them to have this type of communication unseen by me, quietly working against me.

It is a lot more complicated now.  Computers are seized, records recovered every day when the powers that be are threatened enough to look into it.  I don't expect the NSA or CIA to care about little ole Concha who has and continues to be the target of hate.  I don't expect a white knight on a white horse to come riding up and rescuing me.  I don't expect my sister and brother drummers to confront the lier in my behalf.  Heck....I don't even expect Jesus to save me from this.  One thing for sure though, if he did come back, he would not condone the actions of the Granville First Baptist Church (they have changed their name of course), nor would he condone the lie from the drum leader, nor the actions of our military in foreign countries.  If he did come back today, I would expect him to pop in on Wall Street, and upset the money changers:)

So what am I gonna do about the 2 year old lie that the drum leader has been spreading LOL.  Nothing today.  My ancestors warned me that if you tell a lie, you will tell another.  I figure she has two years of spinning the same lie, and I expect that she will spin more to protect the first lie.  Will my sister and brother drummers continue to be fooled?  Will someone ever confront her, and ask her the particulars?  I seriously doubt it.  I know, I came to the drum events, to drum.  All that other drama, just got in the way.  Anytime that drum leader singled out a drummer, we all felt uncomfortable.  She can ban me from Columbus Community Drummers, but she can not do anything except spin this lie behind the scenes in order to manipulate other drummers in other groups.....which she has already done.  She knows I know about the lie today.  She is a coward.  She will insulate herself, by pretending to be afraid of me whenever we happen to be at the same place.  It is her only move.  She has no other moves.  In order to preserve her original lie, she has to pretend to be afraid of what I might do.

I feel sorry for her.  I have many moves left on the great chessboard of life.  I have more options than she does.  I am not protecting a lie.  I am not protecting a hate group disguised as welcoming and affirming.

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